My ex turned my life upside down a quarter of a century after we split
DEAR DEIDRE: My childhood sweetheart has got back in touch after 25 years and it has turned my life upside down.
I’ve been dreaming about her even though I am happily married. It’s really troubling me.
I’m 45 and have been married for 18 years, with two children.
When I was 14, I started going out with this girl from school. It was a typical teenage romance – exciting and intense. When we went to different universities and inevitably split, I was heartbroken.
But I soon got over her and met the woman who is now my wife. I barely even thought about my ex.
Then last month she sent me a message. In it, she told me she was divorced and had been thinking about me. She congratulated me on my career and asked how I am.
I haven’t replied. I don’t know what she wants or why she’s got in touch now.
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DEIDRE SAYS: When someone from the past reappears, it can be unsettling.
It brings up thoughts and feelings deeply buried that sometimes emerge in dreams.
Maybe you have some unresolved feelings that you are not even consciously aware of.
Your ex doesn’t necessarily have ulterior motives. She is probably just on a nostalgia trip.
Replying briefly but politely might help you to stop feeling anxious about this. You don’t have to agree to correspond or to meet.
