I found the perfect woman, but she’s got a serious drinking problem
DEAR DEIDRE: After escaping an abusive marriage, I finally found what I thought was my perfect woman. But she’s an alcoholic.
I’m totally in love with her but her dependency on drink has ruined our sex life and is now destroying our relationship, and her health.
I’m 50 and she is 48. We were friends for several years before we got together three years ago.
My ex treated me terribly and I found it hard to trust anyone. My partner was patient and kind and has made me believe I was worthy of love.
She hid her drinking from me until we moved in together. But now I realise she’s got a very serious problem . . . and it’s getting worse.
She can’t go a night without drinking at least two bottles of wine.
Often, she crashes on the sofa and I have to put her to bed. She’s either too tired for sex, or too out of it.
She doesn’t eat properly and she’s starting to look malnourished and ill but she denies she has a problem.
I’m worried I’m going to lose her to alcohol.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Sadly, you can’t make her stop. She has to admit she has a problem and seek help.
My support pack, Dealing With A Problem Drinker, will tell you where to go for help. Tell her how you feel and ask her if she’ll let you help.
You need support too. Talk to Al-Anon for people affected by someone else’s drinking (al-anonuk.org.uk, 0800 0086 811).