My husband’s would have had an affair – if it weren’t for her rejection

DEAR DEIDRE: If my husband had his wish, he would be in the middle of a full-blown affair.

Luckily for me, the object of his desires was his colleague, who is happily ­married and rejected him.

My husband is 38 and works in a supermarket. We’ve been married for nine years and I’m 37. We have two little boys.

I thought everything was great between us until my husband became secretive with his phone.

It never left his side until one day when he went to take his mum to a hospital appointment, he left it at home and I looked at his messages.

He had been texting this colleague, practically pestering her to see him. He even sent some explicit photos of himself – he’s such an idiot.

This woman was unimpressed and told him where to go.

When he got home, I called him out on what I’d found and he was full of remorse.

He has told me there is nothing going on. He says he would never have jeopardised our ­marriage, or hurt me or the boys.

Although he is trying to make it up to me, the trust has gone. It makes me question everything about our lives and whether he wants to be with me at all.

DEIDRE SAYS: He’s lucky this colleague didn’t report him. Sending unsolicited explicit pictures is now a criminal offence.

Of course you feel hurt and betrayed. He’s had a crisis averted because you caught him out.

He could be looking at a different future if you took the stance that your marriage was over. You’re still with him, which shows your commitment.

Now he will have to work extra-hard to prove he can be faithful and to regain your trust. Anything less than 100 per cent and you would be wise to seriously consider walking away.

My support pack Cheating – Can You Get Over It? explains how to work out whether your relationship is salvageable and how to put it back together again, if you decide you want to.