Baby Left In Drop Box Couple Towns Over So It Can’t Crawl Back

MEHLVILLE, MO—Crossing her state’s eastern border into Illinois to find a more distant fire station, Missouri resident Eileen Fayette reportedly opted to surrender her baby in a Safe Haven Baby Box a couple towns over Wednesday so that it wouldn’t be able to crawl back. “I heard somewhere that as long as your scent is in the air, babies can find their way home from almost anywhere,” said the 22-year-old new mother, explaining that she didn’t want her infant crawling the 30 miles back to her house using its inherent sensitivity to the earth’s electromagnetic fields. “I placed a blindfold over her during the trip so that she couldn’t use any landmarks to navigate either. Hopefully, crossing the Mississippi will disorient her powerful homing abilities so that she stays put this time. You have to go a long way to override an infant’s heightened senses.” At press time, Fayette reported finding her daughter back in her crib the following morning.

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