People say I need to stop having kids but my husband and I don’t believe in birth control – I’ve now a mum to 17

PATTY Hernandez, 40, a cleaning business owner, lives in North Carolina, USA, with her husband and business partner Carlos, 39, and their 17 children. 

Here, she reveals why she doesn’t believe in birth control and whether she’ll have more children despite her last pregnancy being her hardest.

Vintage Vale Photography

Walking on to the maternity ward with my husband Carlos, I was greeted by familiar faces. ‘Patty, you’re back again!’ exclaimed one nurse.

But this wasn’t my second baby. With six boys and 10 girls, it was my 17th.

Growing up with two siblings, I’d always wanted to be a mum, so shortly after Carlos and I met at church in 2006, we started trying.

It took us two years to fall pregnant with our first, Carlos Junior, now 14, and by the time we got married, in 2010, we still had only him. But after that I just didn’t stop getting pregnant. 

Carlos was followed by Christopher, 13, then twins Carla and Caitlyn, 12 – my only C-section birth, as one of the twins was breech.

Then we welcomed Cristian, 11, Celeste, 10, Cristina, nine, twins Calvin and Catherine, eight, Caroll, six, twins Caleb and Caroline, five, Camilla, four, Charlotte, three, Crystal, two, and Clayton, one.

We never set out to have so many children, but as we don’t believe in using any birth control, we’ve let nature take its course. 

Those early years flew by in a whirlwind of nappies, feeds and laundry.

I took to motherhood straight away, though, and my aunt Maria helps out with the children, who adore her.

My pregnancies and births were easy at the beginning, but now I’m older, I’m finding both harder. My recent pregnancy was the toughest. I was exhausted and getting through each day was a challenge. 

I gave birth on February 26 this year, after a 16-hour-long labour – the longest I’ve had. Carlos never left my side, supporting and encouraging me as he always does, and eventually our beautiful boy Canaan was delivered, weighing 7lb 5oz. 

After the birth, I spent four days in hospital, which felt like a holiday – it was nice to be looked after for once!

With Maria taking care of the other kids, Carlos and I joked that being in hospital was the only time we got to sit down and properly talk to each other. 

Once we were all back home, the older children were a great help, changing Canaan’s nappy and comforting him when he cried. Now, 10 weeks on, life is busier than ever.

During the day, I stay home and do the housework, while Carlos goes to work at our commercial cleaning business. I run our five-bedroom house like a military operation – it’s the only way to get everything done.

As well as helping with chores and looking after their siblings, we make sure the children all get a chance to play and be kids, as it’s very important. 

With 19 people in the house, feeding everybody and doing laundry are the most time-consuming tasks. I do the majority of the cooking and spend around £800 a week on groceries.

At the moment, I have hundreds of items of clothes to wash – I’m forever folding washing and putting it away. Like everyone else, I have bad days, when I’m exhausted and just want some time to myself, but with so many children, that’s just not possible. 

When people find out we have 17 kids, they ask why, and I tell them that they are a blessing. Some are quick to judge, saying I shouldn’t have any more children and we need to stop.

I respond calmly, saying that we’re a very happy family, my children are all kind and amazing people, and Carlos and I love watching them flourish.

Others leave nasty comments online, saying we must rely on government support, which annoys me, because it’s not true – we don’t get any help at all. 

Although my last pregnancy was the hardest, I have no doubt that I will conceive again very soon, and Carlos and I will be excited to add even more children to our family.

My doctors have told me there’s been no adverse affect on my body and it’s up to me if I want to keep having more, so that’s exactly what I’ll do until the menopause stops me. 

At the end of each day, after we’ve all had a family dinner and the children are in bed, at 11pm Carlos and I flop down on the sofa, completely shattered but happy.

Sometimes we don’t have the energy to talk to each other, so we sit in comfortable silence.

But we always tell the other we love them, and we count ourselves lucky for having such a big, happy family.