My former lover secretly shared our private X-rated videos on the internet
DEAR DEIDRE: MY ex always dreamed of us making porn films together but I was never keen on the idea.
Now I’ve discovered that he uploaded our private videos to various adult sites — and I’m absolutely devastated.
We had a really adventurous and fun sex life and I always knew he was an exhibitionist but this has really hurt me.
I’m 25, he’s 27 and we were together for two years.
I only found out what my ex had been doing because a mutual friend caught wind of it and told me.
We originally met through friends on a night out and he was the life and soul of the party.
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He didn’t waste any time approaching me and showered me with compliments.
He made me feel so special and sexy.
He wanted me to take him home that first night but I told him I never took anyone home straight away.
Over the next couple of weeks we went out several times and each time he made me feel so desirable.
When we did go back to mine, it made the sex even more intense because I’d made him wait for it.
He told me he hadn’t had a girlfriend for years but that it felt special with me.
I thought we were really falling for each other.
Our sex life was brilliant, and every time was different.
We tried everything, from various toys to different sexual positions and threesomes, and I even agreed to let him film us during sex.
But the one thing I wouldn’t do was share our films with others, and I certainly didn’t want them landing up on any websites.
He tried to persuade me but eventually gave up and I thought that was the end of it.
Then I got my dream job as a fashion buyer in a different city and we started to drift apart.
Next thing, I found out he’d been cheating for months in our home town, so I then finished with him.
That was six months ago and, although I thought I was over him, the latest discovery has really upset me.
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DEIDRE SAYS: It is no surprise that you feel betrayed by your ex.
He has let you down badly.
By sharing and uploading private videos without your knowledge or consent he has also broken the law.
This is considered revenge porn.
You will feel violated and humiliated but you can get help to remove this content.
Take screenshots of any content and correspondence with your ex. You may need it for evidence.
Then contact revengepornhelpline.org.uk (0345 6000 459) who can talk you through your next steps.