After throwing Schofield under the bus, Holly gave us a mind-blowing speech of sanctimonious, carpet-brushing garbage
THE good news on This Morning, yesterday? Doctor Sara Kayat was on hand to deal with all the viewers’ most pressing medical needs.
The bad? It was “the pollen bomb” she really wanted to talk about, not the cheese bomb returning host Holly Willoughby shoved down the audience’s gobs at the top of the show, which will have left a sizeable chunk of the nation feeling acutely nauseous, if they shared the same symptoms as me.
“First, are you OK? I hope so.”
I feel ill.
“I imagine you might be feeling a lot like I have.” Oh God, I’m going to be . . . “Shaken, troubled, let down, worried.” Bleuuuuuurgh. Sick.
The queasiness lasted for the entire 150 minute duration of the show as well, although, in fairness, Holly had an impossible task on her hands yesterday.
Having thrown Phillip Schofield under the bus, in many people’s eyes, she suddenly had to become a picture of concern for his mental health and the great healer of all This Morning’s many ills.
Some of the sanctimonious, carpet- brushing garbage that came out of her mouth, though, blew the mind.
“I hope,” simpered Holly, beginning one particularly grisly passage, “that as we start this new chapter and get back to a place of warmth and magic, that this show holds for us all, we can find the strength in each other.”
Warmth and magic? This Morning? Do me a favour. In just over an hour’s time you, co-host Josie Gibson and the doctor will all be sitting above a caption that reads: “My husband has excessive sweating.”
That’s the thing about This Morning, it shifts gears like a getaway driver and expects us all to move at the same pace, which is wishful thinking on the part of ITV, given everything that’s happened and the fact yesterday’s big guest singer was Adam Lambert who was asked what being gay and the Pride festival meant to him.
To nods of approval he replied: “It’s all about visibility.”
Unless, of course, you’ve been unlucky enough to have an affair with one of the show’s former presenters and then you’ll become invisible in no time at all.
So, I suppose, it is “magical,” in its own way.